Back in skinny jeans

Brad Pitt in the rain in boxers

Apples, peaches, pumpkin pie, let's see Brad Pitt standing by. For Vanity Fair's very first art issue, they have this avante garde video portrait on their site. This one's a bit beetnik, far out, for me, but who cares. It's Brad Pitt getting wet in a pair of boxers. Woo-hoo! Check it out!

It's Halloween. Vamp up if you want

Happy Halloween all! I'm excited to be eating candy corn tonight. Matt hates the orange/yellow/white triangular tidbits, but I gobble them up like Peeps on Easter.

There's been rumblings around the net about a trend in sexy, slutty, debaucherous costumes that women want to where this Hallowed-een. You know, stuff like the slutty nurse, the deviant wench, and the vampy French maid. Here's a catalog of a whole bunch of other skimpy outfits at BuyCostumes.com. October 31 is the one night where porn stars and strippers can actually go out in their "movie" costumes and be okay.

I say, if you are over 21, around people you trust, and stay pretty much sober and coherent, then go ahead and get vampy. Express the sexual fantasy you have.  It doesn't mean that this is proof that women in our society just want to be sluts and objectified. Maybe we just want to have a Ho moment. Why's that horrific? It's one day of the year. It's a chance to get the harlot out of your system. It's supposed to be campy fun. Halloween is about costumes and playing make believe, and the one day where no one will judge you or expect you to jump in the sack because of your "costume."

One year, in my 20's I was a vampy French maid Spice girl, and doing it was a big stretch for me, but one that I wanted to do since I was in one of my "wearing the skinny jeans" phases. I even taped up my boobies to get maximum cleavage. My skirt was so short that it didn't allow for much bending over without any moonshine. I also had 6in platform heels on, so I got to be 6'1". That was super cool. I had a blast that Halloween, and was glad I did it. I still have the costume. One day, it will be the story I tell my grandkids, where they will be shocked at how "hot" grandma was.

When there is more butt crack than skinny jean

This is scary kids. This pic is from a Shanghai site, so if you can read it, this post is about Japanese girls and their really low cut jeans. This girl should never have been allowed into the bowling alley, let alone out of the house. There are more pics to enjoy. This particular blog is of Shandon Erge who claims he is the sexiest piece of man meat in China. He's also  the latest Gawker Douchebag hall of fame nominee. Gridskipper calls Erge Shanghai's Aleksey Vayner.

Shandong (hee hee hee) loves to work on his body, and he REALLY wants to get married. However his execution at finding said wifey is a bit swollen? narcissistic? uh no...unappetizing. He's bringing sexy backward. That's right. The girls aren't too crazy about the Donger but he is not for want from the gay boys. I think it's all the muskles. For the full ghoulish set of details (in English) on Shandon, the wanker dong, check out The Shanghaiist.

And one last word of advice to the Douchebag guys trying to "get" women, before you put out any kind of video on the internet make sure you have other women you know look at it befre you press UPLOAD. The absolute last thing you want is Gawker sending traffic your way for DOUCHEBAG reasons.

When fake hair happens to hot mommas and other riveting skinny bits

Reese Witherspoon and Ryann Philippe announce they are dunzo, uh sorry, separated for "cumulative" reasons. However, if Reese is talking to a high-priced divorce lawyer, that looks like dunzo, finite. Perhaps there may be some hope. We'll hold out until actual papers have been filed. I'm saddened by this news because they seemed like one of the more solid, committed pairs in Tinseltown.  [TMZ]

Not that this is shocking news, but to see the fake hair in action on Pam Anderson head is still enjoyable. See the fake hair on a shopping day with body guard in tow. [Hollywood Rag]

Ivanka Trump is not going to change her name when she gets married for "professional reasons". Can we be at least real here? Ivanka obviously has inherited daddy's delusions of grandeur. Other than being a Trump, and a model, what has this girl done at 25? She's a VP at daddy's company surely because of her experience and accomplishments in business. Right. If she married a Gates or a Buffet, ya think she'd still hold out? [A Socialite's Life]

Geeks carry their love for Star  Wars and action heroes by dressing their pets in like costumes. Ever wanted to see a Yoda Schnauzer? Now's your chance. [Geekzine]

Yes I'm over 35, never married, and have no children. Stop asking me...

1. Why are you not married yet? (if single) Or When are you getting married? (If you are in a couple but not married)
2. Why don’t you have children? (more so if you are part of a D.I.N.K.s)

Typically, the questions are asked at family or social gatherings where someone, usually grandma or grandpa, will yell out the question for all to hear. You quickly start to feel as you have just become the piñata at the party. Better yet, you are still in the room during said conversation, but nonetheless eveyone talks about you as if you are not there, and like all this conjecture is supposed to make you feel better.

Sometimes the answer is just simply, “I haven’t met the right person”. You are really frustrated as to why that special someone hasn’t materialized into your life yet especially since you have been really trying. When my 35th birthday came and I was still single without a sweetie pie, I had a sad cloud hanging over me because I just did not understand how I still had not found someone. I mean, I had like 20 years to practice and search, so you figure that something has to have happened by then.

After 35 the pressure is so on because, well, for the ladies, the time to biologically procreate is coming to a close. People are worried that your eggs are going to shrivel up before any of them get a chance to be spermeated. And for both sexes, you should be married by the time you’re 35 because some rule says so. What that rule is, I don’t know, but there must be some kind of rule or else people wouldn’t be asking all the time “Why aren’t you married?” “When are you going to get married?” “Can I help you find someone to marry?”

For some, the answer may just be, "I don't want to get married." Heavan forbid you make that declararion out loud because then the parade of judgment and finger pointing starts. Some people start to feel sorry for you. Some people theorize that you just need to find the right guy/gal. Some will give you a rosary and say "Here, praying will help you want to get married."

Same thing goes for the baby track especially if you are married. Again, there is some rule that states that all married people must have babies. It’s in some communal rulebook somewhere, most likely in socially-correct-land.

Celebrity man meat on parade...

...oh and there are ladies too. Over at TMZ, they put together this photo montage. "Celebs: Ripped, Raw, and Ready" of celebs they consider to have the best bods in Tinseltown. What I found pleasantly surprising of this gallery is that 10 out of the 17 bodaciously ripped bodies belonged to men and there was no sign of Lindsay, Paris, or Jessica (the daisy duke kind). Most notably in this gallery,"starlet" does not equal "muscles" because well, most of them are skin and bones.

Even better, out of the 7 women, 3 are over 35 years old, and 2 out of those 3 have had 2 babies a piece. One is in her 40's. Out of the 10 men, half of them are over the age of 35 and one is in his 50's sporting a six pack. Ni-ceeee!

Although it's still all about the body, at least this hottie gallery is not all about young studs and starlets. You can be older, a parent, and still sizzle in Hollywood.

Assercise: Boffo bouncing booties

These glutes are made for walking in this most hysterical? assanine? hmm..no..tushtastic rump riot. Looks, too, like you could easily throw in some Kegels during this assercise number.

Tooting the Back in Skinny Jeans horn: "Redefining Beauty" in Hartford Courant

Recently I was interviewed by Joann Klimkiewicz a staff writer for the Hartfod Courant for her article "Redefining Beauty: Could It Be That A Broader Definition Of Physical Looks Is Emerging?" Our pal Audrey Brashich, author of All Made Up, is also quoted in the article. Joann's story is thought provoking indeed.

Joann opens the story with the now infamous Dove Evolution video which shocked everyone because it shows how much manipulation actually goes on in advertising shoots of models. She adds:

"Critics of the beauty and fashion industries are wondering, albeit cautiously, if the campaign's success isn't symbolic of a greater movement of self-acceptance bubbling beneath the pop culture surface, if the female public's collective exhaustion over the narrow portrayal of beauty has them ready to embrace a broader definition themselves."

Absolutely! That Dove video was an incredible education piece. The talk I have heard the most is that people knew that photo retouching was done, but they had no idea to what extent. There is a huge difference between erasing some wrinkles versus making one's neck longer, widening and moving the eyes around, and shaving off the edges of the nose and face. After seeing that Dove video, you are never going to look at a beauty or fashion magazine spread the same.

It's shocking for women to realize that we are chasing a dream that is actually a digital creation. No matter how much you buy, sweat, or wish, the only way you will look magazine pretty is through Photo retouching.

One of the things I touch on also is the power of blogging. When women blog, our voices are heard. One of the ways that we will get Madison Avenue and the fashion world to be more realistic is through the power of our voice, so blog ladies! Blog, blog, blog......