More proof has surfaced for my conspiracy theory ala Hodgins on Bones that Vogue is really science fiction. Behold Aliena Wintour at the Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute's annual gala in her couture spacesuit. See!
And behold, her coif looks awfully similar to that other diabolical menace, Professor Chaos. Aliena Wintour cruises around in her Battleship Voguestar to inflict mayhem and disarray to our normal sense of beauty sensibility. According to her sinister plan, Aliena has done away with the Sixes and has replaced them with the Zeroes.
Her right hand Darth Andre uses the dark side of the force to spellbind talented yet insecure princesses that a size 8 might as well be Jabba the Hut, so start jumping rope cause you can't hologram that size 2 even though you can sure photohallucinate the shasizzle out of it. Oh, Princess Hoochie-be we know you're under the evil spell of the Voguestar but we so hope that your new Prince Cannon can save you from the evil crutches of Ego=MyCareer2.
In a mall far far away, Aliena and Darth Andre have us humans behaving more like Cling-ons rather than Klingons fighting for our way of life. They have their Gisele looking Clone army to do their bidding in the pages of women's magazines across the land. But even though, they try their best to frakk us up in the head, we can prevail. Remember, even in every science fiction story there is a happy ending, and good conquers evil.
May the Spritz be with you.


