Back in skinny jeans

Women's Health Weight Loss: Desperate Headlines or Honest Boo-Boo?

In these tough times, are magazines getting ultra desperate to grab our attention? Case in point is the current Women's Health magazine which I do like and think is one of the respectables in the women's magazine category, however, this month's issue raised a serious eye brow. WH has featured BISJ once before so I'm going to be nice and give the benefit of the doubt that there was some boo-boo with this month's cover.

Right away this headline gets my attention because I was kinda shocked that Women's Health would feature a severe weight loss story, "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks." To drop 2 sizes in 2 weeks is severe in my book, and really unhealthy as you need to drop around 10lbs to drop one size (depending on your height and frame could be more or less), so WH's claim is about 20lbs lost in 2 weeks. Um, that would set off major red flags. Most doctors will recommend a 1-3 lb loss per week as average and a healthy pace. Docs usually suggest dropping no more than 2lbs a week, and as well, pound loss can vary if you are trying to lose 200lbs versus 25lbs.

So, I open to the table of contents, and this is what you see:

I go to page 89, and the title of the page is "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories." I look all over the page and the next page for the headline, "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks." I see it no where. Perhaps I was seeing it wrong so I go back to the table of contents, and nope, I saw it right.

Page 89 is constructed as a special page you can cut out into these handy cards that list ways you can cut out 100 calories in various food categories like at the drive thru, happy hour, dessert, etc. The tips inside are really helpful. And excitedly, our wonderful blogger pal Shauna Reid aka The Amazing Adventures of Diet Girl is one of the cited sources of the story. Yay Shauna!

In the story on page 89, there is one paragraph basically about how if you cut out just 100 calories here and there then "poof" you can drop a dress size. The word "poof" by the way is something they used not me. Seriously, like we've all seen 10 pounds just "poof" into thin air. Maybe in photoshop but not in the real world.

For fun, I do some math in my head. There are 3,500 calories in one pound, so to drop one size, you need to drop about 10lbs which means a total of 35,000 calories you'd need to cut out in one week in order to drop one dress size. That figures then to be a 5,000 calorie deduction per day over 7 days. That is just plain wrong.

So, I scratch my head then I start to feel as if I've been duped like the guy you met on an online dating site, yet when you meet in person he's 20 years older than what his profile said. Yikes! On the WH's website, they have the "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories" story by itself in the weight loss section with no mention of the "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks" headline.

I think the headline, "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories" is exciting and a good headline as its own, perhaps not as dramatic as the drop 2 sizes one, but still, a solid title on it's own. And maybe, that's the problem, the calorie cutting headline is practical like the "nice guy" but not as drool worthy like the "bad boy."

What do you think? Have you seen the issue? Did I miss something because I'd like to be wrong about this? Is Women's Health using manipulating headline tricks us to get us to buy the magazine or is it perhaps a genuine mistake in not putting the correct headline with the story page?

Just Feel The Loooove!

I'm cuddling with one of my nieces over the holidays. She's one in a set of triplet girls. What's interesting about this picture was at the time the picture was taken, I was feeling totally wrecked because I had just found out some ugly truths about my Ex and I was feeling like I was going through a second break-up except this time a messy one. To be honest, I was mentally in that mode, "I totally hate your guts you MFer!" Yeah, kinda ugly.

It's like my niece knew I was feeling sad and unloved, so she just jumped on my lap to cuddle with me, and my mom captured that moment. Let me tell you, any hate or anger feelings I had completely vanished, and I completely absorbed myself with my niece's loving energy, and just felt the love. I melted. It was incredibly healing, and was the best gift I could have gotten from anyone. Thank you sweetie!

Last year, I had the most amazing Valentine's Day with myself mainly I believe because I focused on what was wonderful and loving in my life. I focused on what I had not what I didn't have like a significant other. I could have easily gone done the path of feeling depressed and lonely because the Ex and I had just broken up (initially) 5 months earlier. That Valentine's day 2008, I decided, I chose, to just feel the love that was all around me.

Love without expectations

My point with these stories is that Valentine's day is tomorrow, and the day can get kinda messed up for lots of people because I think we can get too caught up in romanticized love, expectations of what love is supposed to look like, and how love is supposed to be packaged. The commercialization of Valentine's day to me has made us forget sometimes what the day is really about and that is feeling the love that is all around us whether it be from lover, family, child, friend, sibling, co-worker, next door neighbor, the nice check out girl/boy, or strangers on the interwebs.

There is a saying that goes something like, "You have all the love you need right inside you." When you tap into that, I believe that very cool unexpected things can happen, and you attract more love to yourself because you're being open without expectations or rules. Love is free and there is TONS of it everywhere. Seriously, love is everywhere!

Cuties watch out!

This Valentines day, I'm going to be hanging out with a girlfriend and there will be lipstick, high heels, champagne, and cute boys involved somehow. We'll figure it out as we go along, and I love the spontaneity of that. I'm just happy to be spending quality time with my friend who we actually have reunited after a long time of not being in each other's lives as we had our own issues to deal with. But now, I have her back in my life, and it is so awesome! I am just feeling all kinds of love.

I think focusing and remembering the love we do have all around us is going to be especially important this year because so many people have been cranky and feeling unloving because of the economic crunch that's put people in bad moods. Here's a nice homework assignment, the next time someone snaps back at you or behaves kinda testy, try seeing them as a person who is immersed in their own pain, and their attack is not personal but rather a misguided channel of their own frustration and what they need is some love rather than a counter attack. Try it and see what happens.

So, I wish all of you a very Happy and Wonderful Valentine's Day! And yes, absolutely, I extend my love to all of you. Good times! Group hug :-D

Imagine Making Six Figures From Your Twitter

As you know, like many, I got monetization on the brain. How can I make some money fast and now with what I got? Well, apparently, according to Magpie, an ad network for Twitter, I can make six figures like enough to buy a whole town home here in Silicon Valley which is some big coin with my current number of Twitter Followers which is over 39,000 now. It's so wild, and I am very grateful!

But as exciting as this Magpie opportunity sounds, there are realities to consider, and some Jedi Mind tricks. Over at The Everyday Blogger, I wrote up my two cents on Magpie for those of you looking at other ways to make money. People are definitely getting creative!

Quote on Projecting Love

Playboy's March Cover Girl Is Less Naked...

...compared to some of the other men's magazine's for the March issues. Sorry to harp on this naked thing lately, but, I think it's starting to get too over the top. I find it so ironic that the cover girl of the magazine that features naked women inside actually has more clothes on than other men's magazines that don't feature nekkid gals in their editorial.

I'd love to hear from the guy's in the audience. Does a practically naked woman on the cover make you more inclined to buy the magazine? Do you think the overtly provocative sexual poses and skimpier outfits is getting a bit over the top or is fine, magazines are just doing what they gotta do to sell copies?

Because obviously, the trend is to put naked or near naked women on covers to sell more issues. Remember too Jennifer Aniston in her tie and birthday suit for GQ, and now we have Heidi Klum naked in Germany GQ. Isn't GQ supposed to be about men's fashion or did I miss something?

Playboy March 2009 with Aubrey O'Day

Maxim US March 2009 with Eliza Dushka

GQ Germany March 2009 with Heidi Klum who is just plain old nekkid

And of course, as we ughed about before, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2009 with Bar Refaeli. Pretty soon this will just turn into the "Sports Illustrated Naked Issue."

Theory: A Link Between Body Image Issues and Creative Genius

If I were to go pursue some kind of PhD, one subject I would pursue for my thesis is a theory I have on a link between body image issues and creative genius. Having experienced the gamut of mild to severe body image issues myself and meeting many people with similar or related experiences, the one common thing I have observed with all these people is some level of exceptional creativity that is being suppressed or stifled either intentionally or un-intentionally.

I'm not saying this is true of everyone, just those I've met, which again, I'd love to do field work to see if there is some validity to my theory. I can say the link has been true for myself and my personal friends. As part of our healing, when we engage or start expressing that creative side of ours more proactively and openly, the body image issues improve. Getting absorbed in our creative pursuits gives us an outlet and like for me it gives me the space to be heard and seen.

I have spent many a time with my therapists talking about how I often felt that no one "sees" or "hears" me like I'm invisible or something. Then, I would take that frustration out on my physical body instead of channeling that energy into something more positive like creating things. When I write a blog post, take a photograph, create a recipe, design a web page, help someone solve a problem, or film a video post than a big part of me feels seen and heard, and it gives me a better sense of meaning and happiness, again in a more constructive rather than destructive way.

Other notions I have on a link between creativity and body image issues is that the two types share similar traits like being emotional dominant, highly intuitive, perceptive, sensitive, and observant. On the flip side, there is stuff like self destructive, prone to depression, addictive like, and explosive. Like the archetype of the mad artist who engages in drugs, sex, or alcohol, our choice is food, exercise or beauty.

It's a theory....

If you have heard of any current studies or papers that have been done on this subject, please share because I find it utterly fascinating. In this video, at the recent TED 2009 conferencein Monterrey, CA, Elizabeth Gilbert author of the fabulous book Eat, Pray, Love does a 19 minute talk about creative genius and the unfair pressures that culture can put on its creative types to constantly perform especially when they have had huge successes like the one she has had with her best selling book.

This video is really a great presentation and worth the 19 minutes of your time. I enjoyed the whole thing, and could relate to so much of it. I most resonate with how she said something like, "Your job is to just show up and do what you do best."

Books I've Been Reading You Might Like

I'm a book junkie and have a stack of books on my night stand because before I go to bed every night I like to feed my brain with something positive to end my day with and go to sleep with something helpful or uplifting. So, here's what I've been reading lately:

Emotional Bullshitby Carl Alasko PhD

This book is awesome! Explains a great deal actually. The title alone hooked me. What I liked the most is that you get some good exercises on how to be better at conflict resolution.

Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow by Elizabeth Lesser

I don't always read books linearly from page1 to the end. Sometimes I just open up to random pages and read from there which I've been doing with this book. I'm not done with the book yet but so far it's good. My fave part is about Ram Dass and the lesson he learned in being helpless. Very powerful!

Rich Brother Rich Sisterby Robert Kiyosaki and Emi Kiyosaki

Robert Kiyosaki wrote the hugely popular and useful book Rich Dad, Poor Dad. If you haven't read that book, you MUST! Especially now that we're all challenged financially, Rich Dad Poor Dad can help you see the big picture and it's written in everyday speak which I loved. One of Robert's sisters Emi is a Buddhist monk and they wrote Rich Brother Rich Sister as a way to share their childhood, their philosophies on money & spirituality, and as a way to help Emi earn money to help pay for her medical bills from cancer and a heart issue. The insurance companies and hospitals don't give do-gooder freebies. The book brings up some very good points related to the balance of financial and spiritual needs, and how the two are tied together.

Is the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Too Risque or Not?

Yeah, okay it's that time of year again, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2009 hits stands today, and I thought I'd refrain from talking about it this year but two things I just gotta get off my chest.

First, on the cover, what is up with Bar Refaeli and her practically non-existent bikini bottom? Pull your knickers up girl! You can almost see your va-jay-jay. Is it me or is this just way to risque for a cover because honestly if I was with my nieces, I'd cover their eyes.

And that caption, "Bikinis or nothing." Seriously SI, are you wanting to turn Playboy? Inside, there are a huge number of shots where the girls are wearing bikinis that have bottoms that are practically a piece of string with a small patch of fabric, and they are either pulling the bottom down or have their hand near their cee u next tuesday as Charlotte on SITC would say. Did I miss some fashion thing where there is more fabric in my kitchen towel than on the modern bikini?

I thought this picture of Brooklyn Decker would have made for a more tasteful cover.

Second, Danica Patrick, WHY! She's in a teensy bikini lying on the hood of a car like a hoochie mama in a low rider magazine. UGH! Here we have this woman who is so badass on the race track, and then she's gotta go pose on the hood of a car like an ornament. I'm all for showing that your tough and sexy, but girl this ain't the way to execute. Geez! You go forward and backward in the same magazine. The contradiction rattles my brain.

Okay, so there we have it. I could go on more and more about the rest of the magazine but it makes me dizzy. I just find that SI's definition of sexy seems to be going more towards hoochie where it could be more sophisticated. Now, I'm missing the days when Christie Brinkley and Elle MacPherson were the cover girls in their one piece. That was hot. Here's a walk down SI swimsuit cover memory lane.

Better Than Nothin': Take a Tiny Step Outside Your Comfort Zone

Better Than Nothin' Tuesdays is baaaack! This is the time when we give you a hollah for taking even the tiniest and smallest of actions towards your health goals. Here we take a bow for the small stuff because over time it all adds ups and anything like eating one less fast food meal or doing the plank between TV commercials is better than doing zero!

So you comfy?

We all have our comfort zones for a reason because well, we feel comfortable, safe, and secure. We know what we're dealing with. And comfort zones are fine, if you are happy, fine, or content exactly where you are in your life literally, emotionally, or spiritually. However, if you want to evolve, grow, or expand as a person, you will need to start venturing out of your comfort zones whether it be in things like love, career, making new friends, or reaching your health goals.

Many of us continue to hold onto bad habits because there is a comfort there. In our head, we know that things like not exercising, being flaky, or not sticking to better food choices is not getting us to our intended goals like wearing the skinny jeans again, having good cholesterol levels, or lower stress. However, our fears and comforts can take over because it can become more important for us to feel comfortable with the bad habits we know than risk feeling the un-comfortableness of the unknown.

There's something to be said for teensy and tortoise-like

Busting out of bad habits or going cold turkey in my opinion never works long term because ultimately it's way too much change in a short time and it triggers our Inner Resistance Monster who goes, "Ohh, ohh, noooooo. Watcha think you're doing their Kemosabe? I'm shippin' you back to bad-habit-land."

So, let's take it softly and start taking tiny steps outside of your comfort zone. To start off, I'm talking baby steps that are like an inch outside the circle. For example:

• You want to eat more vegetables, and you've been hearing so much about arugula, next time you're out at a restaurant and see arugula on the menu, order it.

• You want to try kayaking but have been afraid of going into the water. Try just going to a store that sells kayak stuff and have a chat with one of the store employees about kayaking. You don't have to sign up for anything or buy anything, but you've made a step into an environment that will eventually get you into the water in kayak.

• You've been thinking for a long time about starting your own business and have even surfed online for entrepreneur resources and have bought books at Amazon, a tiny step you can do is grab a friend and go to small business owner event. There are all kinds of events in your local area for people who want to start their own businesses. You can check with your local department of commerce, entrepreneur or career centers, social groups, and even banks. My local Wells Fargo throws new business owner mixers all the time.

The point is that you're taking a tiny step out of your comfort zone and gaining a step closer to making your dreams a reality and making your goals a step closer within your reach!

So what tiny steps out of your comfort zone have you made lately, and didn't it make you feel good?

Getting Through Tough Times By Asking a Different Question

Just in my own personal circle, many I know are going through some pretty tough times dealing with things around money, relationships, health, and life purpose. Many are asking, "Why?"

• Why am I having a hard time making money?
• Why am I going through this pain?
• Why can't I make {insert your thing} work?
• Why can't he/she just love me and be there for me like they used to?

If you are experiencing anything like this right now, I just want to take a moment to tell you to hang in there. Remember that famous saying:

"This too shall pass"

I know it sucks. I know you feel lost and confused. I know you are frustrated. I know you feel like you're at the end of your rope. I can relate to this because I've been experiencing much of the same thing myself. Just to share some of my "Whys?"

• Why am I soul rich yet cash pinched at this time?
• Why does my Ex get to be with someone new already and not me?
• Why do trashy, snarky gossip blogs and sites that focus on what's wrong in the world get way more traffic than blogs/sites that are positive, uplifting, and helpful?

Over the holidays, I got to such a point of anger and frustration that like in true soap opera form, I threw everything off my desk, and screamed "WHY!" looking up the sky. Later, with hot tears rolling down my face, I curled up in fetal position wrapped in my down comforter and cried myself to sleep. I was so exhausted.

A couple of days later, I realized I got to that boiling point because I have spent too much time focusing on the "Why" and feeling like I was getting no answers. That train of thought just keeps you stuck in lack consciousness, what you don't have, what is not right, what is not fair. When your head gets there, it's so easy to slide down the "Why me" hole.

Put yourself back in the driver's seat

The better question to ask is, "What can I do?" Asking that question puts you in a state of action and possibility. You start to feel some power again because your telling your brain, "Give me a to do list. Give me actions to get what I need." Focusing too much on the "Whys" can make you feel helpless because there are some whys you may never get an answer to, or your answer may not come for a few years, or you may hate the answer you get. But the point is your still not moving. Things are not changing. You're still in a holding pattern.

For example, I wanted to know why it is that my Ex can meet someone so soon after our breakup and be living with her already. "Why?" It's been making me feel a myriad of feelings from discouraged, hurt, and dejected to pissed off, good riddance, and resentful. And all of these feelings are very normal because that's why it's called a break up, something is broken up.

But staying focused on the why and holding onto that frustration is not going to bring me what I really want, and that is a new love. Perhaps, that is one reason why I'm still single and the Ex isn't. He has let go, and I haven't, or he's rushed into something new while I took the time to heal and not drag in old stuff into the new. Who knows.

Instead of wondering "Why" about the Ex anymore, I've started to ask, "What can I do to find myself with a new love?" See already, the energy has shifted. I don't have solid answers but I'm filled with possibilities, and the feeling that I can start doing something to change my current situation which is being single dreaming of imaginary husbands like Dr. Owen Hunt.

For my real husband to show up, I need to start taking actions, and the first thing is to let go of the Ex, and I mean really let go of him and our past. Going to the Philippines with my parents last week, really helped me get some new perspective.

If you're going through a tough time right now, just hang in there. Reach out and ask for help and support even if it is something small like getting an extra hug for the day or having a nice chat with someone who brightens your day. Instead of asking, "Why" start asking, "What can I do?" Has that strategy ever helped you in your life?