What Universe Do These Famous People Live In?

Okay, I know, I know. I've been on a bit of a rampage lately focusing on some low vibe stuff but please bare with me one more moment, and I promise, I'll lay off for a bit.

I'm really thinking that the stress of the economic crisis is triggering some people (famous or not) to switch into denial mode and venture to La-La-Land as they attempt to convince us to come along. Today, I'm just gonna focus on some famous folk.

If it helps, please feel free to Cornify my blog with happy unicorns. I'll understand.

• A-Rod came clean about his juicing but still insisted that his only real crime was being naive, and that stuff at GNC can get you into trouble too. I totally agree with Rob Neyer of ESPN that A-Rod is really sorry - that he got caught. Now, A-Rod is saying he knew he wasn't taking Tic Tacs when "his cousin injected him with an over-the-counter substance to gain an energy boost." Who the hell injects a needle into their arm for an "energy boost" when a can of Red Bull will do the trick? And how do you even try to connect GNC and Tic Tacs with roiding? Jury says: Stick a fork in him, he's done.

• According to People.com, Kelly Clarkson spoke to a group of about 20 pre-teens at a Dove Self Esteem workshop and said, "No girl is perfect. No girl wakes up every day and is like, 'I'm awesome!" Okay, fair enough, what else we got?

She addressed the topic of photoshopping and said, "just to let you know everyone in the magazines is Photoshopped! Beyoncé is one of the most beautiful girls in the world but she gets Photoshopped too. We're all human!" Kelly also mentions that she joked on her blog about how her recent album cover was manipulated, "they have definitely photo-shopped the crap out of me." But what People.com left out was the rest of Kelly's blog post,"...but i don’t care haha! whoever she is, she looks great ha!"

{Okay, breathe}...Kelly is basically telling pre-teen girls that photoshopping is alright and that even someone like Beyonce with her beauty, fame, and talent is still not good enough so she gets the photochopping treatment too, and Dove is sponsoring this. If someone from Dove is in the audience, please tell me this whole Kelly thing is one big story error because if it's true, I'll be heartbroken...really.

• Bar Refaeli's measurements are 35-24-35 and she's 5'8.5". In this Yahoo blog, Sports Illustrated Group Editor Terry McDonnell said, "a skinny waif won't work as the cover model." Bar is curvy. According to the Victoria's Secret sizing chart, Bar would wear a size 2 or Extra-Small. So, I'm curious to know then what measurements SI considers "skinny waif?" I'm just trying to get it straight so I can understand SI's reasoning.

In the same article, we're told that Bar does not diet but eats everything in "moderation". No mention of exercise or athletics, so I'm wondering how someone stays that thin with no exercise unless yeah, she has the genetically blessed metabolism to go along with the genetically blessed looks. However, Bar did have an "ugly duckling" phase which lasted 3 years in school, she had braces and neck gear, and then "poof" she became a swan and signed with a modeling agency. We can all relate, right?

I mean really, can we get any more cliche and fantastical? Oh yeah we could, she could have been working on her medical degree when she was discovered at the mall, and she does charity work in foreign lands with poor children with cleft palettes, and she likes long walks on the beach as she's fit & fun. Plus, she's dating a famous celebrity hunk...oh wait, that last part is true.

• And lastly, I watched 15 minutes of the latest episode of ABC's True Beauty, the show produced by Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks, and I can honestly say that I have never mourned the loss of 15 minutes of TV watching time ever in my life. In fact, I thought a loop of space time continuum wafted into my home and swallowed me up to a parallel universe where absurdity like this is the norm. But no! Seriously, why can't Tyra do some show like, "America's Next Top Mogul." Show off her business skills for once.

Anyone else notice any other "WTF's!" Out of extreme economic stress, you think people are turning up the volume on thoughts of delusion?