Back in skinny jeans

Saving Prada and Dolce: Italy Plans To Bail Out Their Fashion Houses

Here in the US our government is bailing out banks and cars, over in Italy, their government is bailing out cars, domestic appliances and coming up...fashion. Yes, for real. Prada, Dolce, Gucci, Fendi, Versace and the likes of are going to get a government gimme to keep couture from going kaput.

In a NY magazine article, "Italy employs around 80,000 people and is home to 30,000 distribution companies."So now that people are spending less on high end purses, clothes, and jewelry, that means many of these people who create these fashions will lose their jobs.

Now I get that Italy is very proud of their fashion houses, and designers. Indeed, some of the most amazing design and art comes out of Italy, and that is fantastic, wonderful, the world needs beautiful things, I don't disagree with that.

But, in a world economic downturn, where people are fighting to keep their homes and food on the table, high end fashion is on the chopping block of expenses. Who can afford Bulgari and Armani when people are getting laid off and losing their homes? Bailout money is not going to save these Italian designers from that circumstance. It's just prolonging the inevitable.

Instead of getting bailout money, these couture designers should be re-stratgezing their business models and designing for what people can afford not what is ideal, at least until times get better. I'd think it would be cool to see Ferragamo in Payless shoes or Fendi in Target. Yes, I can already see the fashionistas poo-pooing this idea, but hey, wouldn't it be better to sell something than nothing at all because at this rate their warehouses will be filled with pricey skirts and totes no one can afford.

Design a line for the masses.Create luxury on a dime. Give people a taste of indulgence while we're trying to survive through the hard times. When things get better, consumers just may stay loyal to the brand, and work their way up to buying the couture lines when they can. I know I would.

What Universe Do These Famous People Live In?

Okay, I know, I know. I've been on a bit of a rampage lately focusing on some low vibe stuff but please bare with me one more moment, and I promise, I'll lay off for a bit.

I'm really thinking that the stress of the economic crisis is triggering some people (famous or not) to switch into denial mode and venture to La-La-Land as they attempt to convince us to come along. Today, I'm just gonna focus on some famous folk.

If it helps, please feel free to Cornify my blog with happy unicorns. I'll understand.

• A-Rod came clean about his juicing but still insisted that his only real crime was being naive, and that stuff at GNC can get you into trouble too. I totally agree with Rob Neyer of ESPN that A-Rod is really sorry - that he got caught. Now, A-Rod is saying he knew he wasn't taking Tic Tacs when "his cousin injected him with an over-the-counter substance to gain an energy boost." Who the hell injects a needle into their arm for an "energy boost" when a can of Red Bull will do the trick? And how do you even try to connect GNC and Tic Tacs with roiding? Jury says: Stick a fork in him, he's done.

• According to People.com, Kelly Clarkson spoke to a group of about 20 pre-teens at a Dove Self Esteem workshop and said, "No girl is perfect. No girl wakes up every day and is like, 'I'm awesome!" Okay, fair enough, what else we got?

She addressed the topic of photoshopping and said, "just to let you know everyone in the magazines is Photoshopped! Beyoncé is one of the most beautiful girls in the world but she gets Photoshopped too. We're all human!" Kelly also mentions that she joked on her blog about how her recent album cover was manipulated, "they have definitely photo-shopped the crap out of me." But what People.com left out was the rest of Kelly's blog post,"...but i don’t care haha! whoever she is, she looks great ha!"

{Okay, breathe}...Kelly is basically telling pre-teen girls that photoshopping is alright and that even someone like Beyonce with her beauty, fame, and talent is still not good enough so she gets the photochopping treatment too, and Dove is sponsoring this. If someone from Dove is in the audience, please tell me this whole Kelly thing is one big story error because if it's true, I'll be heartbroken...really.

• Bar Refaeli's measurements are 35-24-35 and she's 5'8.5". In this Yahoo blog, Sports Illustrated Group Editor Terry McDonnell said, "a skinny waif won't work as the cover model." Bar is curvy. According to the Victoria's Secret sizing chart, Bar would wear a size 2 or Extra-Small. So, I'm curious to know then what measurements SI considers "skinny waif?" I'm just trying to get it straight so I can understand SI's reasoning.

In the same article, we're told that Bar does not diet but eats everything in "moderation". No mention of exercise or athletics, so I'm wondering how someone stays that thin with no exercise unless yeah, she has the genetically blessed metabolism to go along with the genetically blessed looks. However, Bar did have an "ugly duckling" phase which lasted 3 years in school, she had braces and neck gear, and then "poof" she became a swan and signed with a modeling agency. We can all relate, right?

I mean really, can we get any more cliche and fantastical? Oh yeah we could, she could have been working on her medical degree when she was discovered at the mall, and she does charity work in foreign lands with poor children with cleft palettes, and she likes long walks on the beach as she's fit & fun. Plus, she's dating a famous celebrity hunk...oh wait, that last part is true.

• And lastly, I watched 15 minutes of the latest episode of ABC's True Beauty, the show produced by Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks, and I can honestly say that I have never mourned the loss of 15 minutes of TV watching time ever in my life. In fact, I thought a loop of space time continuum wafted into my home and swallowed me up to a parallel universe where absurdity like this is the norm. But no! Seriously, why can't Tyra do some show like, "America's Next Top Mogul." Show off her business skills for once.

Anyone else notice any other "WTF's!" Out of extreme economic stress, you think people are turning up the volume on thoughts of delusion?

Women's Health Weight Loss: Desperate Headlines or Honest Boo-Boo?

In these tough times, are magazines getting ultra desperate to grab our attention? Case in point is the current Women's Health magazine which I do like and think is one of the respectables in the women's magazine category, however, this month's issue raised a serious eye brow. WH has featured BISJ once before so I'm going to be nice and give the benefit of the doubt that there was some boo-boo with this month's cover.

Right away this headline gets my attention because I was kinda shocked that Women's Health would feature a severe weight loss story, "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks." To drop 2 sizes in 2 weeks is severe in my book, and really unhealthy as you need to drop around 10lbs to drop one size (depending on your height and frame could be more or less), so WH's claim is about 20lbs lost in 2 weeks. Um, that would set off major red flags. Most doctors will recommend a 1-3 lb loss per week as average and a healthy pace. Docs usually suggest dropping no more than 2lbs a week, and as well, pound loss can vary if you are trying to lose 200lbs versus 25lbs.

So, I open to the table of contents, and this is what you see:

I go to page 89, and the title of the page is "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories." I look all over the page and the next page for the headline, "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks." I see it no where. Perhaps I was seeing it wrong so I go back to the table of contents, and nope, I saw it right.

Page 89 is constructed as a special page you can cut out into these handy cards that list ways you can cut out 100 calories in various food categories like at the drive thru, happy hour, dessert, etc. The tips inside are really helpful. And excitedly, our wonderful blogger pal Shauna Reid aka The Amazing Adventures of Diet Girl is one of the cited sources of the story. Yay Shauna!

In the story on page 89, there is one paragraph basically about how if you cut out just 100 calories here and there then "poof" you can drop a dress size. The word "poof" by the way is something they used not me. Seriously, like we've all seen 10 pounds just "poof" into thin air. Maybe in photoshop but not in the real world.

For fun, I do some math in my head. There are 3,500 calories in one pound, so to drop one size, you need to drop about 10lbs which means a total of 35,000 calories you'd need to cut out in one week in order to drop one dress size. That figures then to be a 5,000 calorie deduction per day over 7 days. That is just plain wrong.

So, I scratch my head then I start to feel as if I've been duped like the guy you met on an online dating site, yet when you meet in person he's 20 years older than what his profile said. Yikes! On the WH's website, they have the "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories" story by itself in the weight loss section with no mention of the "Drop Two Sizes in Just Two Weeks" headline.

I think the headline, "78 Ways to Cut 100 Calories" is exciting and a good headline as its own, perhaps not as dramatic as the drop 2 sizes one, but still, a solid title on it's own. And maybe, that's the problem, the calorie cutting headline is practical like the "nice guy" but not as drool worthy like the "bad boy."

What do you think? Have you seen the issue? Did I miss something because I'd like to be wrong about this? Is Women's Health using manipulating headline tricks us to get us to buy the magazine or is it perhaps a genuine mistake in not putting the correct headline with the story page?

Playboy's March Cover Girl Is Less Naked...

...compared to some of the other men's magazine's for the March issues. Sorry to harp on this naked thing lately, but, I think it's starting to get too over the top. I find it so ironic that the cover girl of the magazine that features naked women inside actually has more clothes on than other men's magazines that don't feature nekkid gals in their editorial.

I'd love to hear from the guy's in the audience. Does a practically naked woman on the cover make you more inclined to buy the magazine? Do you think the overtly provocative sexual poses and skimpier outfits is getting a bit over the top or is fine, magazines are just doing what they gotta do to sell copies?

Because obviously, the trend is to put naked or near naked women on covers to sell more issues. Remember too Jennifer Aniston in her tie and birthday suit for GQ, and now we have Heidi Klum naked in Germany GQ. Isn't GQ supposed to be about men's fashion or did I miss something?

Playboy March 2009 with Aubrey O'Day

Maxim US March 2009 with Eliza Dushka

GQ Germany March 2009 with Heidi Klum who is just plain old nekkid

And of course, as we ughed about before, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2009 with Bar Refaeli. Pretty soon this will just turn into the "Sports Illustrated Naked Issue."

Is the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Too Risque or Not?

Yeah, okay it's that time of year again, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2009 hits stands today, and I thought I'd refrain from talking about it this year but two things I just gotta get off my chest.

First, on the cover, what is up with Bar Refaeli and her practically non-existent bikini bottom? Pull your knickers up girl! You can almost see your va-jay-jay. Is it me or is this just way to risque for a cover because honestly if I was with my nieces, I'd cover their eyes.

And that caption, "Bikinis or nothing." Seriously SI, are you wanting to turn Playboy? Inside, there are a huge number of shots where the girls are wearing bikinis that have bottoms that are practically a piece of string with a small patch of fabric, and they are either pulling the bottom down or have their hand near their cee u next tuesday as Charlotte on SITC would say. Did I miss some fashion thing where there is more fabric in my kitchen towel than on the modern bikini?

I thought this picture of Brooklyn Decker would have made for a more tasteful cover.

Second, Danica Patrick, WHY! She's in a teensy bikini lying on the hood of a car like a hoochie mama in a low rider magazine. UGH! Here we have this woman who is so badass on the race track, and then she's gotta go pose on the hood of a car like an ornament. I'm all for showing that your tough and sexy, but girl this ain't the way to execute. Geez! You go forward and backward in the same magazine. The contradiction rattles my brain.

Okay, so there we have it. I could go on more and more about the rest of the magazine but it makes me dizzy. I just find that SI's definition of sexy seems to be going more towards hoochie where it could be more sophisticated. Now, I'm missing the days when Christie Brinkley and Elle MacPherson were the cover girls in their one piece. That was hot. Here's a walk down SI swimsuit cover memory lane.

Diet Pill in Another Country: LESOFAT the Other ALLI

I find it fascinating how you'll find the same product just marketed differently in different countries. While in the Philippines last week, I saw this huge billboard for diet pill Lesofat made with Orlistat which over the counter is Alli and prevents your body from absorbing the fats from the food you eat. The tagline translates into English something like, "Keeping on the fat?" Basically, "the fat ain't coming off?"

And yes, Lesofat has the same warning of spontaneous gas & poop so bring a second pair of pants to work. In fact, that would be funny to spoof that "Jizz in my pants" song with "Poop in my pants."

Last week - I ate a salad
As I recall it was a taco salad
Walked inside into the gym
Got on the treadmill and felt the squirt and I
POOPED IN MY PANTS

Catchy huh!

And how about that name, "Lesofat". Looks like they were trying to be all scientific like it's a real drug. How about Obesegone, Slimostat, Thinmentin, or Skinnioxin? The more medicinal it sounds the more money you can charge or the more it sounds clinically approved by the FDA, Fat Department of Asses.

So, okay excuse my cynicism but these diet pill marketers just really piss me off with the manipulation, and this Lesofat billboard at first glance is just so mean to me. Look at the pose of that woman feeling ashamed and embarrassed because of her weight, and then next to her is the hot skinny girl next to the tagline, "More Life With Less Fat" as saying indirectly that you have less life because your fat.

And after a moment of burning madness and aghast of the tackiness of this billboard, I stopped and then thought, well, harsh reality, there's truth in what they're saying. How many times in my own life did I let my fat keep me from living? How many times did I turn down invitations to go dancing, to a party, or to the beach because I felt too fat? How many times did I tell my boyfriends that I didn't want to make love because I felt fat? I chose to let my fat dictate the level of joy and living in my life.

And when I did get back in the skinny jeans, how much more did I go out? Um, like always. How much more did I feel confident and pretty enough to go to those dances, parties, and beaches because I was thin? Hmmm, all the time. I did do more living when I was thin, so Lesofat's line "More Life With Less Fat" was actually very true in many periods in my own life. What a moment of self realization!

But even with all that realization, the execution of the billboard's message is still tacky and mean girls. I still would not take diet pills especially ones that make you spontaneously poop. I'm too young to have to wear adult diapers, and even more importantly you'd be wearing the diapers just because you want to be thinner. Seriously, would you go that far? Perhaps Alli and Lesofat should do a cross promo with Depends....Okay, did I just go there?

Winners of the Wild Garden Hummus in a Tube

Mucho apologies! I was gonna post this Friday, but something unexpected happened. Thank you for your patience and understanding.

Here are the 10 randomly picked winners of the Wild Garden Hummus in a Tube from the post, "10 Ways to Eat to Next To Nothin' and Win Some Hummus in a Tube."

Michelle commented 1/13 at 6:20am
Mara commented 1/13 at 6:23am
Anne commented 1/13 at 7:49am
Melissa S commented 1/13 at 8:38am
Jamie commented 1/13 at 10:12am
jbuttars commented 1/13 at 11:55am
Theresa commented 1/13 at 1:01pm
Kim commented 1/14 at 6:58am
Patrice commented 1/15 at 3:39am
Tanya commented 1/15 at 4:12pm

All winners have been emailed already. If you see your name, but didn't see the email, please check your spam folder or let me know.

Thank you again to Wild Garden for this fabulous giveaway!

Steph Is Quoted in February's Glamour...Next To a Topless Pregnant Woman in Jeans

I'm very excited to say that in February's Glamour magazine, on stands now, I am quoted in the column of Carmen Wong Ulrich of CNBC On the Money about making money from blogging. Page 124.

See, there it is. Very cool!

Now, you know I am eternally grateful for this inclusion in Glamour magazine with Carmen because that is uber fantastic, but the irony of my quote is that it physically sits next to an ad for maternity jeans by 7 For All Mankind, and the model is um, topless doing the "I'm still sexy and smokin' hot with my pregnant self in couture jeans."

I know the Glamour editors didn't do this on purpose but it feels kinda like, "What! Are you trying to poke the tiger?" So you know I have to talk about this jeans ad because it's what I do.

I have mixed feelings about this ad but mostly it veers into the *ugh* direction. I'm all for portraying pregnancy as hot and sexy, but I'm not digging this particular execution because well who looks like this pregnant woman except for 20 year old pregnant supermodels, and even then I'd think even those genetically blessed women would have a challenging time looking this perfect. Is this a Juno supermodel or some child bride knocked up because she doesn't look older than 21 to me.

The tagline says, "Maternity Redefined." A more fitting line would be, "Maternity. You'll Never Look Like This in Your Dreams."...oh, did I say that out loud?

In fact if someone told me this model wasn't actually pregnant in real life but was photoshopped to look pregnant, I'd believe it. If you know the real model, please let us know if her pregnancy is real in the shot.

On the upside, I have to say, I really love the hairdo. I could make my hair look like that. And I like the fact that a couture designer has made the effort to sell hot looking maternity clothes. These 7 jeans would look cool with a pretty flowy top like this one.

And lastly, she's about what 6-7 months preggers, yes/no? Who's gonna be glamming up that much when you're most likely feeling all kinds of things but sexy. And everything about her is still skinny except for the basketball bump. If she's got 4" spikey Jimmy Choos with those jeans, I'm gonna have to scream. On the Pea in a Pod site, they do have a mama-to-be in spikes but she doesn't look too far along yet, so perhaps the heels would be okay. But still, I gotta think it would ouchie.

The image in this ad is just off the reality scale in my opinion, and just creates yet another unattainable and unrealistic standard of beauty. What do you think?

But really Glamour, thank you again for putting me in the mag. If I can have any say, next time can I at least be next to a hair product ad like for Sebastian or Redken, that would be awesome!

Crotchvertising, TV Doc To Be Surgeon General, and other shimmies around the skinnysphere

I haven't done random links around the skinnysphere in awhile, so let's start off with Crotchvertsing.

• Crotchvertising is the trend in advertising that features ya know, the crotch. It's not new. Remember this Tom Ford cologne ad, and American Apparel is famous for flashing the crotches. So now let's add, a crotch campaign for guys high end watches in Tush magazine. Kinda NSFW. [Trend Hunter]

• And here we have Madonna for Louis Vuitton. I would never expect LV to do something like this but it is Madonna and as par her m.o. she wants to show that 50 is still hotness, and it is a down turn and brands gotta get aggressive. Should we hate the player for playing the game? Here's more from the campaign [Daily Mail] Thoughts?

• Believe it or not, here's crotchvertising for labia cosmetic surgery. So this is another kind of lip job? These folks say they can make your girlie down theres "a more appealing size and shape." Unless you plan a career as a porn star does the looks of your va-jay-jay matter? [Copy Ranter]

• And one last crotch mention, cuz this is kinda funny, here's a bed comforter with a life size image of his and hers crotch covering, and if you turn it over, you get to see the rump roast. [TrendHunter]

• And since all this crotch stuff is WTF, let's add this to WTF, Obama offered Dr. Sanjay Gupta the guy who's been the medical correspondent on CNN and CBS and has even been a People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive dude to be our new Surgeon General. I think I'd rather have Dr. House be SG. [Washington Post]

Paying Respect to the Fabulousness That is Elastic Waist

Many of you may have heard that Elastic Waist will be shutting down along with sister network blogs Product Fiend and Daily Bedpost. Mothership Conde Nast decided that there wasn't enough revenue sustainability in this down market. Seriously, I have no doubt the Dilbert drones couldn't see the future past the stat counter.

The shock of the news is still sinking in because EW is one of our girls, the playahs, the biggies in the healthy living blog niche. I also wanted to point out that I was really bugged by how Mediaweek referred to the three Conde blogs as "little known" so I gave them a piece of my mind over at The Everyday Blogger.

So today, on the last day of 2008, we would like to take a moment and pay our respects to our fellow healthy living blog comrade Elastic Waist. {We bow.}

I wish the best of luck to Weetabix, Anne, Kimberly and everyone else who gave their heart and soul at Elastic Waist. No doubt we have not heard the last of these fabulous people!

Update: Indeed, you can continue to hear some of their lovely voices over at Dearest Mabel minus the borg overlords.

Here's to our Dancing Queens