Back in skinny jeans

A billion for Mimi's gams

Mimi is Gillette's new mouthpiece for their "Legs of Goddess" campaign, so to make sure her limbs stay perfect she has 'em insured them for a billion buckaroos. My first reaction to this was, "Are them Gillette razors that dangerous?" Next came, "If her legs are insurable up to a billion, what's her voice worth?" I mean that is really where her talent lies.

I go back and forth on Ms. Carey. She has a gorgeous voice, and one of my favorite songs of hers is Love Takes Time. I like early Mariah, as opposed to Mimi today. It's kind of like the young Elvis vs. the tired old Elvis. And, I am sorry, but the wax legs version are not an exact replica of Mimi's gams. Maybe in the circus mirror, but not in real life. I almost want to throw a fringed lampshade on the legs. Would make for an awesome White elephant lamp gift.

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Gisele, "No bitches under 20"

This is so outrageous it cannot be true, but then again, uber models can be really weird. Word on the streets of Brazil is that their girl famoso, Gisele Bundchen, 26, has put out an edict that she refuses to be photographed with any models under 20. No more details other than, "I won't be seen with any of them teeny bopper bitches."

For a moment, let's say this is a true statement, and Gisele really did say this. Why? What first comes to mind is, are you THAT insecure that you will not be seen next to someone just because they are a teenager? I mean isn't that taking the competition thing a bit far, and isn't that just plain arrogant? I mean you're 26 for goodness sake.

I contemplate what's worse. "I won't get out of bed for less than $10,000 per day." or "I won't be photographed with any models under 20." Both are fucked up in my opinion, but again, I am not an uber model, or fashionista.

Skinny jeans (the style) vs. Skinny jeans (the size)

This explanation is more for the men than it is for the women because the skinny jeans style is coming into fashion, so it is creating some confusion for those not in the know. Matt for one was confused. During channel surfing, he noticed stories about skinny jeans, and how all the hot celebs are wearing them. He pointed out, “Hey hon, they are talking about your skinny jeans blog stuff on TV. Come see.” Rewinding on Tivo, I saw a stylist talking about the new fashion trend. I tried to explain to Matt, but he just tilted his head with a confused, “Ugh!”

Skinny jeans, the style, are a cut of jeans like saying bell-bottoms, straight leg, or relaxed. The skinny jeans style is pencil leg where the jean from top to foot hugs your leg. To look good in this style of jean, you really do need to be skinny. Although some argue that the skinny jeans style is like denim leggings. Throw an oversized sweater or sweatshirt over, and you’re Flashdanced. Over at Coquette, there is a fabulous synopsis of the skinny jeans style.

Here at Back in skinny jeans the blog, we are talking about the “concept” of skinny jeans which are the jeans (or pants) you wore when you were you’re thinnest and hottest. Your skinny jeans, probably sitting in the dark recesses of your closet, represent a magical time in your life, and you cannot let go of these jeans because the dream of thinness and magic still lives on.

Picture: Levis Skinny 545 Capri

Sleep more. Drop weight

Article: "Lack of Sleep Linked to Weight Gain"
iVillage.com

Women who slept an average of 5 hours a night versus those who got 7 hours of shut eye a night, were 32% more likely to gain the lbs in a major way (meaning a gain of 33lbs or more), and 15% more likely to become obese, according to the Nurses Health Study led by Dr. Sanjay Patel, an assistant professor of medicine at Case Western Reserve University, in Cleveland. The course of this study followed 68,000 ladies over 16 years.

There are more interesting tidbits in the article, like how much food each of the sleepers took in and how it affected their weight gain, and the level of exercise between them. Got me thinking about myself. I am a sleeper. My whole life, I have never had problems sleeping, except the night before the first day of school back from summer. Too excited! I sleep on average 8 hours a night. If I get less than 6, I am cranky and lethargic, and most definitely unable to be creative. So, this study excites me in that all my sleeping also helped keep my weight down. Sweet!

I know lots of creative types who are big sleepers also. Perhaps, tapping into the creative juices takes a lot out of a human, so the body needs to get some deep rest. For me, I dream ALL the time, and many of my ideas and inspiration come from my dreams. I told one of my employers once, "If you see my napping at my desk, I'm actually working. I'm getting the next great creative idea from my subconscious." He didn't buy it, but I really wasn't off from the truth.

If someone asks if you lost your job

Matt and his dad were chatting in the family room during a commercial break, when Dad asked," I heard Steph lost her job."

Matt replied, "No, Steph didn't lose her job. She knows where it is. She just can't go back to it any more."

I think I peed in my pants. How hi-larious! Feel free to use that one, the next time you get canned.

Not that I'm looking, but I am

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Sorry, can't be this real

Before I go anywhere, I LOVE Janet Jackson even with her Nipplegate scandal. She is extremely talented, beautiful (inside & out), and the most normal of all the Jacksons. She has worked hard, very hard to get where she is. Of late, the press was totally ragging on her for getting fat. She got up to 180lbs, and folks were blaming it on the stress from Nipplegate, a divorce from a marriage no one knew about, a failed album, and the circus that was her brother Michael's trial. The whole world thinks your brother is a pedophile. That's got to be stressful. She says the weight gain was for a movie role. With all that kind of stress, hell, almost everyone would seek food as comfort, and hide in rolls of fat. If it were me, I'd probably break the 200 lb mark.

So now, Janet is on the cover of US magazine practically naked, saying, "How I got thin." The first time I saw this cover, I gasped. I mean damn, she does look hot, and she has a six pack. AND, she just turned 40. She makes 40 look like a hot tamale with mucho caliente sauce. Can I get some?

Dropping 60 lbs in 4 months is quite a feat, and although I know it is possible through natural means when you have a trainer, a chef, and an assistant all helping you, part of me just doesn't buy this photo. You definitely know that there was photoshopping going on here, because ALL the magazines tweak the cover shots. How much photo manipulation went on is the big question. Also, I can't help but think that there was some lipo and maybe some diet pill popping going on too. Call me cynical, but I don't buy that this whole 4 month, 60 pound metamorphosis happened naturally. It's okay in my book if it didn't, just admit it.

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You are so in my skinny jeans

For some Friday frivolity, US magazine online is conducting a Hollywood Hot Bodies poll, and leading the pack is man candy, Matthew McConaughey. Go make your voice count. Vote!

Scientists create artificial Johnson for rabbits

I found this study utterly fascinating.  It has a potentially big implication for men with severe erectile dysfunction. Women are vain about their looks, and men are vain about their kickstand, trouser snake, heat seeking moisture missile. 

The study was led by Dr. Anthony Atala, director of the Institute for Regenerative Medicine at Wake Forest University in Winston-Salem, N.C. Rabbits with badly damaged wee-wees were given grafts of "specially" engineered winkie tissue. In time, the new cell tissue got busy and created a new one-eyed monster. Now here's my favorite part of the study:

"The researchers found that the new penises were similar in structure to natural rabbit penises. The "artificial penis" also achieved and maintained erectile pressures equal to those of normal rabbit penises.

Next came the real test, as the rabbits that had received the new penises were presented with sexually mature females. Things proceeded just as nature intended, the researchers said."

Yeah ba-by! As Austin Powers would so proudly say of these newly mojo'd rabbits.

More details on the study here.

Quote: Excellence vs. Perfection

"I am carfeul not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence I can reach for, perfection is God's business."

                                                                Michael J. Fox