Back in skinny jeans

They don't pick 'em like Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway anymore

Before Pierce Brosnan and Renee Russo swang in The Thomas Crown Affair, the original starred Steve McQueen and Faye Dunway in 1968. You know they just don't make stars like Steve and Faye anymore, such class, panache, and sex appeal. Here's the trailer for the original of The Thomas Crown Affair including a steamy kiss. See how the truly ravishing movie stars work it.

Jessica thinks carts are runways

Allure magazine grants Jessica Simpson's wish to model ball gowns in a grocery cart. Guess we're supposed to get the "Employee of the Month" plug, but I think that this is stupid frankly. Oh cantankerous I am.

[via PopSugar for more Jess pics]

Dr. Phil must "ship out" in class action suit

Looks like Dr. Phil Inc. will have to shell out $10.8 million in a settlement towards a class action suit related to his line of Shape Up diet products. Allegedly, none of the goods worked and everyone who used the Dr. Phil diet wonder conconctions remained their same old overweight selves. Diet pills and food that fail to make you thin. What a shocker.

However, before you start doing the "class action settlement" jig. This is what the plaintiffs get:

"To palliate the plaintiffs, Dr. Phil and his fellow defendants will be setting up a fund in which the plaintiffs can choose between Nutrilite vitamins or a whopping $12.50 in cash."

Do the vitamins at least come in Flinstone shapes?

[via TMZ.com]

Those who nip/tuck eat the forbidden fruit

“Shari Noble” is one of, if not the most, peevish Nip/Tuck episode I have ever seen. I have a beastly image of freckled face Laura Ingalls and a half-pint of Skippy peanut butter burned in my brain for all eternity. Damn you Nip/Tuck! Let’s get Cliff noting shall we. 

Every single pretty person in this episode is completely off their rocker. Julia though is trying to stay in her rocker, at least long enough to get Conor to suck out some boob juice. She contemplates popping baby blues pills, and alas her Scientology son was no where to be seen. Amusingly, the only normal one in the episode was midget manny Dinklage, the wise grasshopper, who also paints perfect murals of original sin, and bangs chicks in the ballet and buyers for Saks. 

Scheming lesbian blackmailer Countess Andrenyi has returned to extort a Michaelanglo special for one of her lovely beauties who fucked up royally. What she did exactly is of no matter. All we do know is that cockeyed masochists will use art to bludgeon anyone who gets in their way. 

And speaking of cocks, our budding lascivitor, Shawny, breaks brownie with the obsessed Carol Seaver look-a-like, Monica Wilder. Butt alas, before Shawn could get to shagging the Seaver’s beaver, the devil/angel duo show up. The devil appears in the form of evil ass fucking drug lord, Escobar Gallardo who Shawn publically loathed yet secretly envied.

And, who to play the angel, ahhh, but it is the perfect Megan O’Hara, Shawny’s true love. Too bad she opted to smother her face in a plastic bag and suffocate her way to heaven. In the end, the respectability in Shawny prevailed, and he high tailed his wandering trouser snake back to Julia. 

And speaking of snakes that are insane, Christian goes with Liz to a lesbian bar to teach her the wonder of his munchicity so that she can find the vagina of her dreams. Christian gutter balls with Number 10 but Liz gets a perfect strike. Waking up from a drunken one night stand can prove to be horrid sometime, but nothing can be as gruesome as waking up to find your kidney missing. 

Okay! After that body organ nightmare, midget mannies fornicating doesn’t sound so bad now, does it? 

And one for the road, if Christian can’t much on a yummy lesbian, he’ll blackmail his boss Michelle into bumping uglies in the den right before they have their crab cake appetizer with JR Ewing in the dining room. Oh! The lives of the pretty people. You're my obsession.

Letter to the fashionistas: It’s not about the dress

In the media there has been all kinds of buzz and chatter about models being too thin.To address my viewpoint, I decided to write a letter to the fashionistas (basically all who work in the industry of fashion and beauty)

Dear fashionistas, 

We do love the creativity and originality in your designs, and we do enjoy the occasional glamour and glitz. It is fun to place dress up. However, you have a serious problem that is no loner going unnoticed. It's in the New York Times, USAToday.com, Katie Couric is highlighting the issue, and it's around the blog world. At what point have you decided as a majority that it is more important for a dress to look better then the person wearing it? It’s not about the dress. It’s about the people wearing the dress. A dress is not who we are, it is what we wear. 

Models who are too thin, modeling agents who defend the rights of the naturally gazelle-like models and just doing what the designers ask of them, and designers who want a dress to look just as good on a human as it does on a hanger, is not a problem of the body, but of the mind. It’s not about the dress. It’s about the mindset that you have created and create every day that is fueling society’s obsession with the body, and the perspective that if we, members of society, can just conform to the image of beauty that you have shaped at the moment, than we too can be worshipped, accepted, and loved. 

It’s not about where the problem originated, it’s about everyone who is contributing to it. Our problem is not that we hate you for being beautiful; it’s that you are putting profit and the dress before the person. All of you (models, agents, designers, show producers, retailers) are powerful creators and you know that. To deny the power that you hold in our society because there is now a spotlight shining on a serious problem in your industry is both irresponsible and ugly. You are now being given an opportunity to move toward a higher standard of being in the world, so take it. It’s not about the dress. It’s about what you are going to do next. 

And you are not the only contributors and creators of society’s obsession with the body, the media, Hollywood, corporations, and we the consumers are contributing to the problem as well. As a society, we deem it more important to be pretty than to be real. We show our young and ourselves that the prize to win is that of adoration and worship from others. The fastest way to achieve all that idolizing, by the “rules” today, is through physical beauty and money. 

We tie our sense of value and worthiness of love to how we measure up to the images of beauty we are bombarded with everyday. If you are hit with a message every single day, it starts to become a belief. And those who make the most money in our society are the ones who do the best job of making people feel and look pretty, and who have the level of beauty that others revere like fashionistas, plastic surgeons, the weight loss industry, make up creators, actors, rock stars, and athletes. 

Beauty does matter, and the desire for beauty is part of being human. As citizens of humanity we have been given things like nature, the arts, food, and design to inspire us, move us, and bring us joy. We are not asking you to turn off or ignore what is part of our human existence. We are asking for you to put the well being of people before the dress. We are asking for balance and variety. We are asking you to expand your minds so that you take into account that beauty exists everywhere and in everything, and comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. You design for people, not for hangers. We are asking you to remember that it is not about the dress.

Thank you,
A fellow creator

 

Steven Colbert "Nails" Fearless Arianna Huffington

Arianna Huffington has been out promoting her new book, On Becoming Fearless, and I mentioned awhile back that she offered all the attendees at BlogHer back in July a copy of the book. I got mine, and have been reading it. For those worried that her book gets political, I can tell you that so far, it's  written just like a bunch of female mentors sharing their advice on life, love, and dreams.

What I like is that it it's just Arianna talking about her experiences but includes stories on fearlessness from other famous women like Diane Keaton, Melina Kanakaredes of CSI:NY fame, Sherry Lansing, and Nora Ephron of Sleepless in Seattle fame who also has a book out on women and aging, "I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts on Being a Woman"

Many of us put our life on PAUSE because of fear, and reading books like this which have stories from famous people sharing their own fears is a good read. You realize that the only difference between that famous person and you is that they didn't let fear stop them from their dreams.

Via Gawker, here's a funny video clip of Arianna on The Colbert Report.

Skinny links to cool blogs

• Check out some of the far out, and I literally mean that, outfits from London's fashion week. [Neatorama]

• Simply shocking! Study shows that women actually would rather see skinny models than "normal" sized models.Of course, we'd never say that out loud. [The Runway Scoop]

• City of Calistoga, CA bans fast food nation. See, there really is something in the water. [diet-blog]

• Got disposable income? 1 out of 5 Americans would use the dough for some nip/tuck. [that's fit]

• Marc Jacobs allows, actually encouraged, porn filmmaker to shoot a full fornication scene in his NYC store. Yet another reason to wash your clothes right after you buy them. [Gawker]

Janet Jackson on Oprah

Janet Jackson was on the Oprah show yesterday to help promote her new album "Janet 20 Y.O." which drops today. 20 Y.O. stands for 20 Years since she took Control of her career.

Janet opened the show with a performance of the song Nasty, and she was fierce. Stunning actually. This woman definitely is no wilting 40-year old. The bolt-on boobs are still a bit much, but Janet was fully coutured to rock. Why can't she wear more clothes when she does magazine covers? I'm a huge Janet fan, but the indecent proposal mag cover poses are leaving me boobtose intolerant.

On her 60 pound weight loss in 4 months, Janet says that she did it naturally with the help of a trainer and a nutritionist. Oprah asked her if she took any weight loss pills, and Janet said that she only took vitamins and natural supplements. A while back, I said that Janet had to have had some nip/tuck done because that's an enormous amount of weight to lose in a short time and to get a six pack. Janet sounded sincere and said that it upsets her that people think she she used unnatural means, but the jury is still out for me, and I could be completely wrong.

On Justine Timberlake, Janet feels that JT left her hanging to dry by herself. He comes out just this month to defend Janet:

"If you consider it as 50/50, I probably got 10 per cent of the blame - and that says something about society. I think America's harsher on women and I think it's unfairly harsh on ethnic people."

So how come you didn't say any of this two years ago JT?

On boyfriend Jermaine Dupri, "a man who takes her places she's never been", like Egypt, jokingly, Janet looks nastily happy and in love. Good for her! You can get the new CD Janet 20 Y.O.today.

For more pictures of Janet on the Oprah show.