Too much fat with Alli the first FDA approved OTC diet pill can make you poop worse than Al Bundy on laxatives
Dr. Oz has been telling us all on Oprah that healthy poops should be a lovely S-shaped roll of perfection. But, apparently, if you take Alli (pronounced ally as in everyone needs a drug as their BFF), the first FDA approved over the counter diet pill, with more than the recommended 15 grams of fat per meal, you
may experience “treatment effects" which include “gas with oily spotting, loose stools and more frequent
stools that may be hard to control.”
So, let me get this straight. If you were to take an Alli and eat a Taco Bell Fresco Style Steak Chalupa Supreme which has 21grams of fat in it, you would need to wear a Depends adult diaper because your ass will lawlessly spit out clumps of lardy, unbound shit. Wow! Oh, but it gets better.
It is also recommended that: “Until you have a sense of your treatment effects, it’s probably a
smart idea to wear dark pants and bring a change of clothes with you
to work.” So, you can forget about wearing that cute sundress for Happy Hour Friday with your co-workers.
And according to GlaxoSmithKline, the average weight loss after a six-month
program with Alli is 10 pounds. After a year, that number barely budges
to 10.5 pounds."
10 pounds in 6 months? WTF. If I just close my eyes, click my heels, and think of Kansas, I can lose more weight than that and also not be saddened that Auntie Em is not there to wipe my poopy ass.
Too much fat with Alli the first FDA approved OTC diet pill can make you poop worse than Al Bundy on laxatives
Dr. Oz has been telling us all on Oprah that healthy poops should be a lovely S-shaped roll of perfection. But, apparently, if you take Alli (pronounced ally as in everyone needs a drug as their BFF), the first FDA approved over the counter diet pill, with more than the recommended 15 grams of fat per meal, you
may experience “treatment effects" which include “gas with oily spotting, loose stools and more frequent
stools that may be hard to control.”
So, let me get this straight. If you were to take an Alli and eat a Taco Bell Fresco Style Steak Chalupa Supreme which has 21grams of fat in it, you would need to wear a Depends adult diaper because your ass will lawlessly spit out clumps of lardy, unbound shit. Wow! Oh, but it gets better.
It is also recommended that: “Until you have a sense of your treatment effects, it’s probably a
smart idea to wear dark pants and bring a change of clothes with you
to work.” So, you can forget about wearing that cute sundress for Happy Hour Friday with your co-workers.
And according to GlaxoSmithKline, the average weight loss after a six-month
program with Alli is 10 pounds. After a year, that number barely budges
to 10.5 pounds."
10 pounds in 6 months? WTF. If I just close my eyes, click my heels, and think of Kansas, I can lose more weight than that and also not be saddened that Auntie Em is not there to wipe my poopy ass.
So, let me get this straight. If you were to take an Alli and eat a Taco Bell Fresco Style Steak Chalupa Supreme which has 21grams of fat in it, you would need to wear a Depends adult diaper because your ass will lawlessly spit out clumps of lardy, unbound shit. Wow! Oh, but it gets better.
It is also recommended that: “Until you have a sense of your treatment effects, it’s probably a smart idea to wear dark pants and bring a change of clothes with you to work.” So, you can forget about wearing that cute sundress for Happy Hour Friday with your co-workers.
And according to GlaxoSmithKline, the average weight loss after a six-month program with Alli is 10 pounds. After a year, that number barely budges to 10.5 pounds."
10 pounds in 6 months? WTF. If I just close my eyes, click my heels, and think of Kansas, I can lose more weight than that and also not be saddened that Auntie Em is not there to wipe my poopy ass.
[via Revolution Health]
Posted by Stephanie Quilao on Jun 15, 2007 in Skinny commentary & news | Permalink
Tags: Alli, diet pill, FDA approved, GlaxoSmithKline
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