Since you all enjoyed pal Nathan the last time he posted here, "Guy’s perspective: The Skinny on Botox, Boobs, and Chicken Breast", I invited him back. I'm trying to convince him to be BISJ's "Jake" ala Glamour as I think it's good to have a male voice around the house. You should hear some of the convos Nathan and I have. We're always in stitches! But today, Nathan's gonna get a little more introspective and thought provoking.
At the end, continuing our birthday week celebration, you can enter to win a pair of Joe's Jeans, Steaz Organic Teaz, or Sephora "Skinny Jeans" nail polish.
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The Desiderata hung above my father's bed for many years and was subsequently passed down to me sometime during my teens. Throughout the years I have tried to integrate as much of it's teaching as possible into my perception of life.
That specific line from the Desiderata has always stood out to me as one of the most important of its teachings. In society we are in constant competition with one another for things such as jobs, money, sports, and in just about every aspect of life. Culturally, most of us are trained us to be in constant judgment of ourselves based on our self-perceptions formed by our own beliefs of how we compare with others outwardly. Here's a perfect example...
We have all at one time walked into a social gathering or event and almost immediately began to mentally create a superficial pecking order of those in attendance. Like, who's here with who. Who's wearing what. Who looks the best and not. Who's eating and drinking what. Who looks happy and not.
The quote above teaches us that this pecking order is simply a matter of perception, and judgment serves only to make us feel better or worse about ourselves but only in comparison to others which again is all subjective. For there will always be women prettier, thinner, smarter, brighter, and sexier than you, and at the same time there will always be women less prettier, smarter, brighter, and sexier than yourself. Likewise there will always be stronger, better looking, richer and smarter men than me, and less stronger, better looking, richer and smarter men than myself.
Aren't we enough as we are?
In truth, comparing yourself to others is an endless game. If you think you are the most attractive person alive, you are most inevitably mistaken. If you think you are the least attractive person alive you are also mistaken. Even if you achieve the best, you'll soon find someone who's bested that. And the game goes on. The more energy you focus on comparing yourself to others, the less energy you are spending on your own growth and uniqueness. What works for someone else may not work for you and vice versa.
As a young man, I remember bringing in pictures to the barber of movie stars or picking out a picture in one those stupid barber shop books. I would say to the barber "cut my hair so I look like this guy". Even when the haircut came out the same, I of course never looked anything like the picture.
On one occasion, I cut my hair extremely short so I would look like some guy my girl pals said was cute. Unfortunately, a shaved head is not my best look for my head is shaped like an egg and the lack of hair makes my ears appear to stick out about a hundred times further than they already do. Not good! I had to wear a hat for month.
Why did I cut my hair? So I’d appear more handsome to women like some guy named Paulo in a magazine. Of course, I never asked myself, "would this style look good on me or is this something I'd like?" I went with what my crowd thought popular. Ridiculous, yes. Uncommon, no. Lesson learned.
Competing with others on the basis of physical appearances or trying to emulate someone else is futile.
Everything is relative and subject to perception not to mention what's popular changes constantly. For instance, you look into the mirror one day and see nothing but flaws. The next day you look into the mirror and see a gorgeous woman. Same face, just different perspective. Ever watch How to Look Good Naked?
If you do not like what you see in the mirror, change your perspective and be kind to yourself, for there will always be lesser and greater people than yourself.
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Ok, Steph back here. Seriously, if you want an eye opening experience on how simply changing your perspective can make you feel so much better, do watch How to Look Good Naked. Watching the transformation in these women is very inspiring. I so want Carson to be my Fairy God Pick Me Up.
Today we're gonna chill with Diana Krall and her version of Billy Joel's "Just The Way You Are." Diana's version is so sexy! Great song to slow dance with your sweetie :) 
Today's giveaways, here's all the details, will be qty-1 pair of Joe's Jeans (gals or guys style) to first winner, qty-1 Steaz Organic Teaz gift basket to a second winner, and qty-1 Sephora by OPI bottle of "Skinny Jeans" nail polish to a third winner. Winners will be picked randomly.
To enter to win, you must submit a comment about one thing you've learned about appreciating what is special and unique about yourself versus comparing yourself to others. I can say for me that I've learned that the grass is always greener on the other side, and someone who may outwardly seem like they have it all may really not be happy at all. Happiness is not mutually exclusive to stuff or accomplishments. I'm learning to focus more on becoming a more expanded and healthier version of myself.
Only one comment per person. Comments open until midnight PST Sat Nov 22. US residents only. {Much apologies global folks.}
